DRAG ME TO HELL

Director: Sam Raimi
Stars: Alison Lohman, Justin Long, Lorna Raver, Dileep Rao, David Paymer, Reggie Lee
Year: 2009
Rating: UR

I had such high hopes for this film, having wanted to catch it in theaters. Directed by one of my favorite directors (Sam Raimi) and co-starring one of my favorite actors (Justin Long), being a horror film fan this was one I was really anxious to see when the DVD finally arrived from Netflix.

Surprisingly, I almost turned the film off a couple of times while watching it. But I stuck it out to the end, when - despite from some cool special effects - I found myself no more impressed or enamored of this misfire.

Alison Lohman is badly miscast as Christine Brown, a mousy young loan officer at a bank who's vying with a co-worker named Stu (Reggie Lee) - one who doesn't fight fair - for a promotion to assistant manager. Her boss, Mr. Jacks (David Paymer), seems to be accepting Stu's sucking up - and has in fact told Christine to her face that he's wondering if she would have what it takes for the position.

Fate, that very day, brings a haggard-looking woman with a thick accent named Mrs. Ganush to Christine's desk. Mrs. Ganush (played to perfection by Lorna Raver) is literally having her house repossessed out from under her, and there to beg the bank for an extension on her mortgage. Christine, feeling sorry for the old gal, takes the issue to Mr. Jacks - who, summarily, uses Mrs. Ganush as a test case for Christine, to see just how tough she is. And sure enough, to prove herself the right person for the assistant manager's position, Christine turns down Mrs. Ganush's extension - even after the woman begs her.

Things get a bit hairy, and security has to escort Mrs. Ganush from the bank - but that night, Christine pays for the humiliation she caused the old gal, when Mrs. Ganush attacks her in her car (quite possibly the best scene in the film). Their fight ends up with Mrs. Ganush mumbling a curse at Christine ... and from that night on, Christine's moments are filled with stranger, loud noises, ghostly apparitions of a horned-head figure, and a presence in her home that literally stalks her.

Even Christine's boyfriend Clay (Justin Long) thinks she's just suffering from shock, after the attack, but when Christine insists on seeing a spiritualist (Dileep Rao), she soon learns that she is, indeed, the victim of a curse - a curse that, unless she can figure out how to break it in three days' time, will result in a demon that will come for her, and literally drag her down to the bowels of hell.

Raimi, director of films like the Spider-Man series and Army of Darkness and the Evil Dead series, often blends a twisted or dark sort of humor into his most chilling or bloodiest of films. I don't know if that was what he was shooting for here, but with Drag Me to Hell the effort comes off as silly - the laughs, when they come, feeling unintended. Alison Lohman, seemingly cast because Christine Brown IS supposed to be the mousy type, is so wishy-washy and mousy here, it's hard to figure out how the hell she got to the point of being a loan officer at her bank in the first place. From the scenes where she's terrified to the scenes where she's finally getting up the strength and will to fight back, she just feels very unbelievable in the role. The gross-out horror stuff (mostly consisting of different kinds of fluids being spurted into a characters face/mouth) is just plain lame, more annoying than shocking - and even Justin Long looks pained in every scene he's in. Lorna Raver, brilliantly wicked as the gypsy-like Mrs. Ganush, is even a bit over-the-top in her performance at times ... as is Dileep Rao, as the spiritualist/psychic, who overacts at almost every turn. Even Reggie Lee, in the end, hams it up - making you wonder, as this seems to happen often in the film, if maybe all the melodrama is the result of Raimi's direction.

As this was one film I was so anxious to see, the disappointment cuts fairly deep that it's slow, silly, and (aside from some nice special effects, and a few jump-in-your-seat moments) not particularly original. Normally rated PG-13, I caught the "unrated" DVD director's cut - though there's no real need to. And definitely don't see this film if you're a cat lover; that's as much as I'll say on THAT point, for sure. *1/2 - Get Reel-Reel Mediocre